My dad has some depressive issues, and he's really tough on himself. So sometimes he can say things that are not super supportive. Like once I did a set, and he says, 'Sheesh, no wonder you're still single.' I was like, 'Eight ball, corner pocket, dad.'

Maria Bamford

I never really thought of myself as depressed so much as paralyzed by hope.

Maria Bamford

It's always the compliments from people you love that mean so much.

Maria Bamford

I think taking vacations and turning off the phone and only doing emails or social media for a specific short amount of time helps with work/life balance. If I'm checking it all day I start to feel cuckoo-bird. So I just do it once or twice a day instead of a thousand. And then remembering that it doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter.

Maria Bamford

I love festivals because they seem like more of an artsy, supportive attitude - which benefits a more theatrical performer sometimes with having theater and other non-club venues, as well as the audience being filled with other artists. It's nice to be with other comics, as usually at other road gigs, I'm solo for the most part.

Maria Bamford

Schizophrenia is hearing voices, not doing voices.

Maria Bamford

I do some compassionate mindfulness every day. It's like a Buddhist thing. I tell myself that I'm doing a good job, that kind of thing. It makes me feel better.

Maria Bamford

I get sort of short with people and start grumbling and clearing my throat - in honor of my father - when I'm impatient. It's very charming.

Maria Bamford

I think I, like a lot of people, have that type of brain where I find it interesting or fulfilling to worry about something.

Maria Bamford

I'm sort of shy, and Twitter feels like chatting all day with a group. I like to follow people. I'm following Joel Osteen, Steve Martin, and an anonymous purple egg - just to see where they go with it.

Maria Bamford

I like all kinds of comedy. I like comedy that doesn't talk about real beliefs or serious thoughts, but then I also like the stuff that does. I think it just depends. It's a completely personal choice.

Maria Bamford

I love that vision-board thing where you cut out pictures that resonate with you so they'll manifest. I've done that since I was three; I cut out pictures of ladies from the JCPenney catalog.

Maria Bamford

When I'm up on stage and do a joke, half the people interpret it one way and half of them interpret it the way I want them to.

Maria Bamford

Get out of your house and go see some live performance, for God's sake. There are people creating things just outside your window.

Maria Bamford

I have a hard time with interviews, because I'd rather hear about the interviewer.

Maria Bamford

I have a comic character - my sister said that I'm the victim of every joke I tell.

Maria Bamford

I find it creatively satisfying to write material and say it out loud in a public place, whether or not anyone's listening.

Maria Bamford

I express things through characters because I have a fear that my own voice is irritating because that's been said to me.

Maria Bamford

I have received more fulfillment and adulation than I would ever know what to do with in terms of show business.

Maria Bamford

Some of my friends and family have tried to challenge me to do jokes that aren't as self-deprecating, where I genuinely express my own opinion in my own voice.

Maria Bamford

I was raised in Duluth, Minnesota, where you never say that you're cold, or that you're suffering, and you listen politely to people, even if you disagree with them completely. Then you say passive-aggressive things later.

Maria Bamford