To be an Instagram model, you absolutely cannot just post pictures of yourself in a bikini for the sake of people seeing you in a bikini - even if that is exactly what you are doing. No, you need to caption these photos with an inspirational quote so that people will know that you are not just a butt, you're a gosh dang philosopher.
Kat Timpf
It's always better to treat those with whom you disagree with compassion - if not for compassion's sake, then because it makes it much more likely that they'll actually be willing to listen to what you have to say.
There are some professions, of course, where licensing is important. For example: If there's someone out there claiming to be a top heart surgeon whose only qualifications are having played Operation as a child, then I'm going to have a problem with that. I'm definitely going to say that jail time is appropriate in this instance.
President Donald Trump has now sued the New York Times, the Washington Post, and CNN over opinion pieces that they've published - and really, he should stop.
Although I certainly do love animals, I have to admit that I also love eating them. (Particularly cows. And chickens. And the occasional lamb).
See, as a libertarian, I am actually far more liberal on the issue of immigration than many people might expect.
If you have ever read my columns, you know how important free speech is to me... and how important it should be to everyone.
For some reason, our culture is one that preaches that furthering your education is something that is always worth the price tag, and the truth is, that simply isn't the case.
See, one of the greatest things about living in the United States is that we have the absolute freedom to say whatever we want about our government, while being protected against government retaliation.
Too many people don't look at things objectively and try to see the facts; they instead look at them through their partisan lenses and try to figure out how to twist or spin them to fit their own 'side.'
Make no mistake... 'South Park' is brutal. It takes subjects that aren't supposed to be touched at all and handles them roughly. It's true that it's crude and rude and disgusting, even in its treatment of subjects that are supposed to be solemn - spoken of only in polite whispers and polished platitudes if they're ever spoken of at all.
The United States is, after all, supposed to be a free country - and it has never made any sense to me that choices about what to put into our own bodies aren't ours and ours alone.
Trump and his supporters often lambast news sources such as CNN as being the 'fake-news media' whose only goal is to take him down, and they're really doing themselves no favors when they say things that seem to support that.
The reality is, punishing people by using a sentencing enhancement that was clearly intended to punish people who had been doing something far worse is, by definition, a miscarriage of justice.
I have lexical-gustatory synesthesia. I can taste, and always have tasted, words. I remember when I was a kid and learning to read I mentioned to my mom that certain words I was learning tasted certain ways, thinking everyone was like that, and didn't understand why she didn't get what I was saying.
I know it can be difficult to try and achieve your dreams when you don't have the same advantages as some other people may have, but this is a country full of opportunity where amazing things can happen, if you are willing to hustle and be smart about it.
Let's all be honest here for a second, okay - bacon? Not even that good. Now, I'm not saying that it's bad. I like bacon-wrapped dates, and I've also been known to enjoy a BLT a couple of times a year. What I'm saying is, bacon is fine, but it is objectively not so good that we need bacon-scented sunscreen.
There's people on the left who refuse to consider that anybody but the government can solve any of their problems.
I am, quite clearly, no fan of PETA or its way of thinking - but that doesn't mean that I want the group to be silenced. Instead, I have simply done what we all are supposed to have the right to do in this country: to use my own speech to counter what I disagreed with, rather than to move to silence it.
I myself have appeared on countless panels alongside people with whom I've disagreed, at times even vehemently - and yet, the thought of closing out those segments by grabbing their notes and ripping them up has never even crossed my mind.
Let me be clear: It's not that I'm not a patriot because I want to keep flag-burning legal, it's that I want to keep flag-burning legal because I am a patriot.
Straight-news pieces are supposed to be just that: straight news. They are not supposed to be biased, and a longtime practice for ensuring this is to ask all subjects of a story for their comment.
In fact, I can confidently say that 'South Park's' penchant for unbridled derision has been directly responsible for my own joy in some times of terrible sadness.
I'm sorry, but there is absolutely no reason why bacon envelope glue should exist, let alone be so popular that it's sold out.
Getting the police involved or levying an absurd punishment just because that's what some zero-tolerance rule mandates - even though it's clear that the student in question wasn't a danger - doesn't make anyone safer. Worse, it can actually cause harm.
Don't like flag-burning? Fine. Hate flag-burning? Me too! The thing is, though, hating something doesn't always mean that the answer is to call on government powers to ban it - and, in fact, I'd say that that is rarely the best solution, especially when it comes to speech.
The greatest risk in giving our government any power to control our speech is that it would then have a vehicle to prohibit speech that was critical of it.
Throughout his career, Bloomberg has repeatedly shown blatant disrespect for individual rights and civil liberties. The first thing that comes to mind is probably the way he tried to micromanage New Yorkers' food choices during his time as mayor.
As a general rule, I don't like to see laws that allow for the arrest and incarceration of people based on a sort of subjective standard.
Football is, honestly, so objectively bad that I have always been convinced that the only reason it is so 'popular' is some kind of mass conspiracy. Everyone who 'likes' it is just pretending to like it because they see other people 'liking' it, and now we are all forced to endure it.
I know that money is precious - but, at least to me, laughter and expression are even more so.
Few things are more important to me than the values that we hold dear in this country, and so I believe that there are few things that could be more important to teach our students in the classroom.
People often give Biden a pass for inaccurate and misleading statements - writing them off as nothing more than Crazy Uncle Joe being Crazy Uncle Joe.
Our freedom to criticize the government - as openly and brutally as we want to - serves as a vital check against unbridled government power and control.
My first job ever real job in the field was as an airborne traffic reporter and producer in Los Angeles, but I was laid off pretty quickly - which was totally fair, because I'm terrible with directions, and that's kind of the whole job.
The bottom line is, our law enforcement is tasked with protecting us from harm - not with creating it by levying penalties for 'offenses' that present no real risk to anyone.
People actually have the nerve to ask me if I want to go to a haunted house. Why would I want to go to a place where I have to pay my money for creepy strangers to be able to harass me without legal repercussions?
Many people have made sacrifices to continue their education, or to allow their children to continue theirs. Others have made sacrifices by taking a path that didn't include continuing, because they could not afford to do so. None of these are things that could ever be replaced with cash.
To me, it seems pretty obvious that socialism is terrible. After all, do you know what's not terrible? Freedom.
I myself have been the victim of some absolutely horrific speech throughout the years; I know how bad it can make you feel - and yet, I still believe firmly that no words directed at me could ever feel worse than having to worry about losing my right to use my own.
Kids only have a certain number of years to be kids, and the last thing we should be doing is incarcerating them for wanting to make that short-lived magic last.
Like him or not, you really should respect the fact that Justin Amash makes his political decisions based only on his principles - which is truly refreshing in our hyper-partisan era.
I can't be alone in saying that humor has gotten me through some hard times in my life.
The truth is, one of the best things about being 15 years old is that things like candy are still exciting. Once you get older, once you've been knocked down enough by this cruel thing we call life, that just won't be the case anymore. Eventually, you'll become jaded.
See, believe it or not, I actually support complete free speech not because I don't care about the welfare of the American people. I support it because I do.
Yes, dodgeball encourages competitiveness. Yes, the stronger, more athletic kids are going to be more successful at it than the weaker ones, but what game doesn't have winners and losers?
There is value in education, but, as we do with anything else, we should start being careful to weigh that value with the price tag that's attached to it.
I was in the journalism program in college and had some internships in print journalism during the summers. The plan was to go to Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism to learn broadcasting after I graduated. I was enrolled and everything, but ultimately decided that I could never afford to pay back the loan I'd have to take out.
As a woman, I have faced issues that men do not have to face - sexism included. I think that all women have, and that is totally unacceptable.
An invaluable part of intellectual (and personal) growth comes from having the freedom to express your own ideas, and to engage with the ideas of others.