Everyone has to go to a funeral at some time and you need to be dark and sombre, and in a black tie.
A. A. Gill
The easiest time to be funny is during a fairly serious situation. That way, you can break the ice. It's crazy, but even at funerals, people will get huge laughs.
Adam McKay
I don't have any set things that I'm looking for, like, 'I've done this now I want to do this,' kind of thing. Just read the material, if it appeals, if it makes me laugh: like, 'Death at a Funeral' made me laugh out loud.
Alan Tudyk
I've been to many funerals of funny people, and they're some of the funniest days you'll ever have, because the emotions run high.
Albert Brooks
I went to Jimmy Gandolfini's funeral, and when I was there, I realized Jimmy Gandolfini didn't have Twitter.
Alec Baldwin
We're passionate musicians, but we felt classical concerts were more like a funeral because nobody talked and everybody was dressed so conservatively. We thought that's kind of strange, because music is full of life! We thought we could break through that barrier with theater and comedy elements.
Aleksey Igudesman
I remember when my father passed away, we drove the funeral procession past the bank so he could say one last goodbye. That's how much the bank meant to my father.
Alexi Giannoulias
My father always wanted to be the corpse at every funeral, the bride at every wedding and the baby at every christening.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I've had some really big hits with 'Groundhog Day' and 'Michael,' 'Multiplicity,' 'Four Weddings and a Funeral.'
Andie MacDowell
An elephant funeral makes me weep every time, and so does an ad with a kid leaving home for college.
Andrew Sean Greer
I used to sing at funeral homes for families that didn't have a vocalist. I didn't get paid. I needed to sing.
Anita Baker
There are so many cruel decisions parents have to make when their child dies. The funeral director requested a sheet for the coffin, and I sent the cozy flannel one, pale blue with happy snowmen, that had just been put away with the winter linens.
Ann Hood
I did become quite well known from 'Four Weddings and a Funeral', and it helped hugely. I wasn't as famous as Hugh Grant, but I certainly began to work.
Anna Chancellor
I remember from my father's funeral that the minister kept using a metaphor about life of a prism. And I took that away like a cherished image.
Anna Deavere Smith
My own funeral, I'd like to be laid out in a coffin in my own house. I would like my coffin to be put in the double parlor, and I would like all the flowers to be white.
Anne Rice
Dad was wiped from our lives. The day after he died, every photo of him disappeared from the house. It was as if he'd never existed. Me and my brothers weren't even allowed to go to his funeral. His death was made absolute.
Ant Middleton
If my fans want to do something for me when that time comes, I say, don't waste your money on me. Help the homeless. Help the needy... people who don't have no food... Instead of some big funeral, where they come from here and there and all over. Save it.
B. B. King
I tell my children now that they are older, 'If something happens to me... don't make no big fuss over me. Don't make no big expense on my funeral. Don't put any pressure on the rest of the family. I've loved everybody, and I hope they loved me. But don't create this big expense for the family.'
I had a sort of classic moment when a friend of mine rang up and said she'd just been to a funeral, and in the middle of the eulogy, this kid had taken out the phone and had a whole proper text conversation - while everyone was weeping!
Beeban Kidron
Talk to people no one else is talking to. Who would have thought that giving a speech at a funeral at age 12 would introduce me to a man who would introduce me to my first business contact who would introduce me to several other important people in my life. That's luck. That's randomness.
Ben Casnocha
We experienced a miscarriage at 13 weeks and then a few years later we lost our son Willem at 30 weeks. I held him in my arms and had to organise his funeral.
I mean I'm one of those people that laugh at a funeral. And it's always the worst time, but there's always a place to find something funny.
It has to do a lot more than just twerking. It's feel good music; it makes people have a good time. It doesn't matter what type of situation they're in, we bounce all around New Orleans. Weddings, birthday parties, funerals. The whole nine yards, and it's a happy music, it turns people from a frown to a happy smile.
People are scared to make something that doesn't look like another film that made a lot of money. It means we get 'Four Weddings And A Funeral' made again and again.
I was fantasising about my own death, I started thinking what my funeral would be like and what music would be played, I was at that level of insanity.
The funeral business is so manipulative emotionally. I would want to be thrown into the sea or burned - something that's not a big hassle.
I was so angry at God for taking my father from me that I marched up to my mother before the funeral and told her I was going to quit nursing school. I just wanted to stop living.
There will be no funeral! Before I get too old and ill, I'll go to South America and live among the Pemon people and meditate. When the time is right, they can throw my body into the volcano.
Military families miss out on experiences that most civilian families do not: birthdays, anniversaries, vacations, funerals and even the births of their children.
The home funeral - caring for the dead ourselves - changes our relationship to grieving. If you have been married to someone for 50 years, why would you let someone take them away the moment they die?
The biggest problem is the funerals that don't exist. People call the funeral home, they pick up the body, they mail the ashes to you, no grief, no happiness, no remembrance, no nothing. That happens more often than it doesn't in the United States.
One of the things that was most shocking to me about starting to work in the funeral industry is just how industrial the environment is.
I remember in 'Pride and Prejudice' I had to do a scene where I broke down. And before we filmed I spent like three hours imagining my mum's funeral. Actually, she's very much alive, happy and healthy. It was really horrible.
I never laugh or smile when I am writing. When I come home for lunch after writing all morning, my wife says I look like I just came home from a funeral. This is not bragging. This is an illness.
I've been at the funerals of a lot of people in my neighborhood. Sometimes when I sit back and relax, I think about that and just blank out.
I don't believe in funerals. I believe in celebrating life, and showing people, while they're alive, how much I care about them. And I don't believe in this business of burial. I'm an organ donor. Whether its my skin or my eyeballs, use whatever bits are intact and put the rest in the garbage.
When it's the funeral scene of 'My Girl,' and Thomas is in the casket, and the young lady is screaming that he can't see without his glasses, you can absolutely, absolutely cry. Perfectly big, crazy tears all over your shirt, into the arms of others.
To the solemn graves, near a lonely cemetery, my heart like a muffled drum is beating funeral marches.
Anything awful makes me laugh. I misbehaved once at a funeral.
I have asked to have no funeral, and no memorial service. I hate other people's and would certainly not appreciate my own.
I played a funeral convention once. York Casket Company pays well, in case anyone's wondering!
I grew up singing in church. My family owned funeral homes so I would sing for the occasional funeral, as well.
One of my first public performances was singing hymns at a funeral for a friend of our family.
I used to work in a funeral home to feel good about myself, just the fact that I was breathing.
You can have money piled to the ceiling but the size of your funeral is still going to depend on the weather.
Depressions may bring people closer to the church but so do funerals.
If you don't go to other men's funerals, they won't go to yours.
I've got no idea when I am going to retire. Whenever they pick me up and take me to the funeral home, I guess.
It's bad taste to be wise all the time, like being at a perpetual funeral.
I will miss my pal Dominick Dunne. I am sure his funeral will be just the sort of event he would have loved. Based on who will be there, I am sure he wishes he could have been there to cover it.
