You may have read that I went to M.I.T. In 1982 I filled out a Who's Who survey with joking responses, and they never bothered to check the facts.
Chevy Chase
I turned down 'American Gigolo.' There are many films - like 'Ghostbusters' - that I turned down... The first one I did was 'Foul Play' with Goldie Hawn, but I turned down 'Animal House' - I turned that down.
All my children inherited perfect pitch.
Parrots make great pets. They have more personality than goldfish.
Break as few bones as possible and make as much noise as you can.
Frank Capra's grandson was a second Assistant Director on 'Christmas Vacation.'
Last good pratfall I did, I broke bones in both hands. I still feel it when people shake my hand.
I come from a much freer kind of performance thing, where I rely on my own improv and my own sense of humor.
They can't make any of these talented young actors Fletch. You might as well make a movie called Chevy Chase.
Anything I have blown a lot of money on? Well, I have three daughters and a wife - that's four women, and I'm working on a sitcom, so you could say that I am just trying to stay alive!
I was always the guy getting kicked out of my classes at school for having an attitude problem.
I've usually had two styles: the Fletch character and the Clark Griswold character.
It's incredible. Twenty-three minutes on the air, and I've got to shoot for twelve, fifteen hours a day. What the hell's that?
The idea of trying to write sketches the same way we did on Saturday Night Live every day would be damn near impossible.
Most of the films I've done were ruined in the postproduction, not during filming.
Nobody prepares you for what happens when you get famous, and I didn't handle it well.
Chaplin was my idol. I remember watching those movies at this little theater in Woodstock, N.Y., when I was probably 6 and laughing so hard at the surprises, like Keaton suddenly being dragged by a streetcar.
I turned down 'Forrest Gump.'
I have been asked to direct many times and usually said no.
The raising of an eyebrow, how you do it; when you look, how you look. All those little things are physical.
You can't observe as much if you're observed by others.
I have three daughters. I wanted them to be raised where there are real seasons and where everyone their age wasn't trying to get into movies.
If you get 'hot,' everyone's nice to you.
In this business, you can come and go in a second.
Anybody can reach anywhere from five to 15 million people weekly making a president look like an idiot, as I did back then, or Tina Fey did with Sarah Palin... You're always preaching to the choir one way or the other.
I am just happy that I have children. I don't care what they want to do!
I guess I look so straight and normal, nobody expects me to pick my nose and fall.
I've always loved the 'Weekend Update' people.
The best advice I can give you about falling is to never land.
Laughter kills lonesome. It's one of the great things in our lives.
I really love making movies. I just have this yearning in my stomach to go back and somehow subversively screw up television a little bit again.
Any good actor has to have a good sense of humour, too; they have to be able to manipulate people.
I'm a New Yorker, and I live in the country.
I did comedy and parody television in the '70s. I was a liberal Democrat, and it was a very heady year.
Anyone who wants to run has to be a Jimmy Swaggart, minus the default.
I would love to do a movie with Albert Brooks; we're so different, but I find him so funny, and I can be just as seemingly narcissistic as he comes off, the 'it's all about me' kind of thing.
I think the Clintons are brilliant. I've never met a person as intelligent as Bill, and I think Hillary is right up there with him. They're too smart for Washington.
If what you do in life is perform to open up eyes and minds, to make people laugh, then it better damn well be new! It shouldn't be just a repetitious 'Hey, I'm still here!'
I did very well when I was younger, and I am fine.
I was very involved in political satire, and I'd been writing parody for 'Mad' and 'National Lampoon,' so I made up some strange story about Gerald Ford.
It took me 20 years of making movies to learn how to do it.
It seemed that my brother and I were always fighting in the back seat, and there was never any real reason for it.
My father was the funniest guy I ever met. I'm not sure if I stole his stuff or if I inherited it.
Television doesn't make stars. It's the written media, the press, that makes stars.
I'd never be tied down for five years interviewing TV personalities.
There was a whole slew of 'Cops and Robbersons,' just films that didn't measure up, that didn't stand for anything comedically. They were purely for a paycheck.
Let's not call physical comedy falling down and pratfalls. All humor is physical, no matter how you dish it out. It's timing, like a dancer or an athlete would have.
There are very few solid family films. A lot of the writing is awful.
A laugh is a surprise. And all humor is physical. I was always athletic, so that came naturally to me.
When I saw 'Caddyshack,' I realized I couldn't act.