I like to decide the night before Thanksgiving that I'm gonna do it, and I'll see what riff raff is around. Then I get that last-minute surge of energy. But if I had two weeks to plan, sometimes I wish I wasn't doing it. But very seldom does that happen.

Amy Sedaris

Time Thanksgiving Wish

My favorite things often have a story behind them and are usually handmade or discovered at a flea market.

Amy Sedaris

Usual Us Tory

I have always wanted a bunny and I'll always have a rabbit the rest of my life.

Amy Sedaris

Life Easter Ways

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy.

Amy Sedaris

Health Food Diet

Well I went to New Orleans to cover the jazz festival for Trio, it's this new arts channel, it's really great.

Amy Sedaris

Great Art Well

I wouldn't call myself a shut-in. I have the ability to leave my home; I just choose not to. But because I'm such a homebody, it's important to be surrounded by things I love.

Amy Sedaris

Love Home Would

I'm gonna do the whole bedroom in camel color - it's an old lady color.

Amy Sedaris

Whole Who T

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper.

Amy Sedaris

Mom Easter You

Don't make anybody a homemade gift. Unless you're really good, or it's going to be really practical. If it's a little thing you think is cute 'cause you made it, just forget it.

Amy Sedaris

Home Good You

I'm very domestic; I love cleaning. I love cooking. I like waiting on people. I just like to make things. I don't break that down to be weakness, or the only things women can do, or putting me back 20 years.

Amy Sedaris

Women Men Love

I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive.

Amy Sedaris

Use Us Unattractive

People that know me know that I cook. I cook every night.

Amy Sedaris

Very T People

I love costumes. My dream growing up was always to have my own costume and prop shop.

Amy Sedaris

Love Wing Win

I have no desire to carry a movie.

Amy Sedaris

Car T Sir

There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything.

Amy Sedaris

Humor Very Thing

My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him.

Amy Sedaris

Relationship Good Ways

I like to just make things... If I have the TV on, I'm not just going to sit there. I want to do something with my hands; I've always got a project. Or I get a small group of people over, and I say, 'Let's make these things today.'

Amy Sedaris

Wit Ways Way

I think it's still kind of weird to memorize a line, because you're supposed to 'be' this person, you know? So then its like, if I'm really this person, how can I be in the moment if I know there's just one line I'm supposed to say? It doesn't feel natural. I always just kind of want to say whatever comes up.

Amy Sedaris

Mom Men You

I always liked my teachers, and I was in a lot of after-school projects. I was a Girl Scout until my senior year, when I couldn't be a Girl Scout anymore. I was in clubs like Junior Achievement, and I ran track and field. My grades were good, but then toward 11th grade they were nothing. I always went to summer school.

Amy Sedaris

War Teacher Men

I feel confident writing on my feet with improv, but it's different when you're sitting down and writing it out.

Amy Sedaris

You Writing Wit

I have a lot of fake food in my apartment, but I'm picky about it. Old plaster food, like from the '50s is really nice, hollowed out paper-mache food from old plays - the new stuff just looks too good.

Amy Sedaris

Men Good Food

I like working with the public, and I like that it's really hard work.

Amy Sedaris

They just expected it to you know... Paul, Steve and I could have hired our own publicist, if we wanted to, but I kind of liked the way it was more of a cult thing and those that liked it, liked it, you know what I mean?

Amy Sedaris

You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character actors who come in like a breath of fresh air.

Amy Sedaris

Whenever I do your show, sometimes I get a little check in the mail and then I take that check and buy a new pair of shoes, and then I wear those shoes the next time I do your show.

Amy Sedaris

You think in a different way when you don't have any money. The joy of poverty is that you use your imagination to come up with stuff.

Amy Sedaris

I like to make things, but I looked at old craft books on weaving or mosaics or whatever, I'm like, 'I don't really know anything about that stuff.'

Amy Sedaris

But I always like to play ugly people who think they're pretty.

Amy Sedaris

A lot of crafters, they're shut-ins.

Amy Sedaris

I'd just much rather see an ugly person take the trash out than see somebody really pretty taking the trash out.

Amy Sedaris

But I love how people who are musical, they know how to dress.

Amy Sedaris

I feel so free and open to ideas, and I get inspired by everything.

Amy Sedaris

My kitchen's pink, like skin-tone pink, and I lowered my spice rack so it's eye level - it's true! - and my phone, so I can reach it when I fall, it's right there.

Amy Sedaris

A lot of times girls think they're funny, but they want to pretty at the same time, and if you want to be funny, you have to be willing to get ugly.

Amy Sedaris

We're all used to seeing pretty people. I want to see real people.

Amy Sedaris

I like crafts that are made out of necessity because they're a little naive - you made it because you needed it.

Amy Sedaris

Books are challenging and inspirational to me.

Amy Sedaris

It was more of their quirky show. It was more like a cult show. The ratings weren't really that high.

Amy Sedaris

I like to play unattractive people who think they're pretty. You can do what you want, but I prefer to look interesting.

Amy Sedaris

Sometimes, to keep things exciting, I decorate my house as if I owned a child. I'll toss a tiny pair of shoes in the hallway or lean small wooden crutches in what I refer to as 'the baby's room,' which is actually a tiny space where I make things. I continue to call it the baby's room because it confuses people and it's creepy.

Amy Sedaris

I like to decide the night before Thanksgiving that I'm gonna do it, and I'll see what riff raff is around. Then I get that last-minute surge of energy. But if I had two weeks to plan, sometimes I wish I wasn't doing it. But very seldom does that happen.

Amy Sedaris

I want witchcraft so bad that I can't stand it. I have wands in my apartment. And I use them sometimes. I walk into the kitchen with my wand, and I come out with something on a platter and I say, 'See, magic happens.' Works every time.

Amy Sedaris

I love theatrical props: a cup filled with solid fake tea, say, or a collection of fake food, including a rubber turkey, which, during the holidays, I wrap in tinfoil so it appears to have just come out of the oven.

Amy Sedaris

I always knew I didn't want kids, and I didn't want to get married.

Amy Sedaris

I love cop shows and crime books and thrillers, and before I die I'm gonna play a cop.

Amy Sedaris

When I'm by myself, I never play music. I have a lot of it, for a girl, but I don't listen to it a lot. I hate picking music out; I'm not good at it.

Amy Sedaris

I always find something to keep me busy.

Amy Sedaris

David and Dad didn't get along too well growing up. I mean we all got along, but it was harder on David, because David wasn't going to be the son that Dad wanted. But now they're like best friends.

Amy Sedaris

I failed first grade, which is my biggest problem. You always feel like a failure, like you're stupid.

Amy Sedaris

I'm not a first-place person.

Amy Sedaris

I'm not ambitious.

Amy Sedaris