Depression is a serious thing and, after my defeat to Pacquiao, I was facing retirement and didn't cope with it very well.
Ricky Hatton
Ultimately when I fell out with my parents, I hit rock bottom. I didn't care whether I lived or died to be honest with you.
I was always very depressed, even when I was a youngster.
There's no better feeling in the world than when I walk in a pub, or a nightclub or a bar or a supermarket, anywhere, and you see people out the corner of your eye and they're going, 'Hey, there's Ricky Hatton. Isn't he a good lad, coming for a pint with us in here?' It makes you feel proud.
The manner of my defeat against Mayweather and certainly Manny Pacquiao was a bitter pill to swallow.
People say, 'We remember the good times.' Well I remember the bad times.
It makes me very, very happy to get someone a world title shot, which I've done with a few fighters, or a European title shot or a British title, and I see them lift that belt above their waist and they come to me and say 'Thanks Ricky. I've just paid my mortgage off with that.' That's what its all about.
It doesn't matter how many people say 'don't be hard on yourself,' I feel like I have to redeem myself to my fans, my family and the whole of British sport.
They say 'you've over trained, you've left it in the gym' is the most common phrase used in boxing but my god it is the truest.
I've fought at such a high level I couldn't have people look at me and say, 'well, he's just fought someone to knock them over.'
If, and when, I do eventually decide to retire, the announcement will be made by myself. I feel that I have earned the right to do it myself.
I wouldn't say Floyd Mayweather Jr is running scared of Amir Khan. Floyd doesn't need to run from anybody. Look at the names he has beaten during his career and it is an impressive list.
I was getting depressed, I was going out, having a few drinks and the worst thing you can do with depression is add alcohol to it.
He's a very, very clever fighter, Manny, but you'd have to say the cleverest fighter in boxing is Mayweather. He adapts his style against whatever opponent he faces.
I want to go down as a champion who redeemed himself, made up for letting everyone down and regained his self-respect.
Would I change anything? I don't know, that's a double edge sword for me.
I've always been the local lad, boy done well, kid next door.
Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom to think: 'Blimey, Ricky, get a grip.'
I don't mind getting beaten by Manny Pacquiao, Floyd Mayweather Jr and people like that, but I'd hate to go into a training camp with my heart not fully in it and risk getting beaten by somebody who shouldn't be beating me.
People with success are less able to cope because you're used to being on Mount Everest and when it's gone, what do you do?
It's a hard game, boxing. You're up every morning running every day, you train in the afternoon, you're dieting, you're up and down in weight and it can wear you down.
My mum and dad had four pubs when we were growing up, but the main one was the New Inn in Hattersley, on the estate. It was a very good pub.
I feel I let everyone British sport, British boxing, my community, my home town of Manchester, my family my kids, I feel I've let everyone down with the troubles I've been in.
People say maybe I could have got better performances out of myself or I could have a got few more fights out of myself if I looked after my body a little bit more but at the end of the day it was because I was jack the lad.
Once I got beat by Mayweather I felt so ashamed. I cancelled all my functions, all my appearances, I didn't want to walk down the street. I was too embarrassed to even go and have a pint with my mates.
I can remember how I felt the first time I was knocked out by Floyd Mayweather Jr. My first fight afterwards was against Juan Lazcano at the City of Manchester Stadium. Every time I got punched I felt like I would wobble.
I feel happier about things, I don't blame myself over the losses.
I'm known for my strength and it helped that from a young age I was carrying around crates of beer or carpets and heavy rolls of underlay.
You can't kid the public. When they see me they see I'm just a kid off a council estate - no more, no less.
The thing is with boxers we don't come from Cambridge and places like that, we come from council estates. So in boxing it's very, very hard.
Pacquiao has been stopped a 'couple of times by body shots and has been knocked out and I don't think there's anything you can do to improve your ribs or chin.
I'd go into the pub and start crying even before I'd had my first drink.
First time I had my defeat, it was very hard to come to terms with.
If I'm going to end my career, I want to end my career at the top.
Depression is a very serious thing. People don't realise how deadly it can be.
I always loved training to get fit, make all those sacrifices that you do, but it just wasn't there after Pacquiao.
No. 1 career highlight? It would have to be getting the MBE from Prince Charles at Buckingham Palace.
The high of victory in the ring was bigger than the biggest party. You'd get in the ring and hear thousands of fans chanting your name and I'd be giving it all back for them.
If boxing had a professional boxing association or something like that, I think it would be a better place.
It's an individual sport so you get in the ring on your own and then when you retire you tend to spend the rest of your life on your own.
It got to a point where I didn't care if I lived or I died.
Everyone knows my story and lots of people have been disappointed in my deterioration as a man. But they can see I'm trying to get better.
Boxing has been very, very good to me.
Life has kicked me hard, hasn't it? Some of it's my fault, some of it's not my fault.
I don't want to be fighting at four or six-round levels - I want to fight for world titles.
People say nice things about me but they don't know what's been going on between my ears.
Growing up in a pub taught me a lot about life.
Before I turned professional I used to do carpet fitting for my dad. I wasn't much good, it's a miracle I've still got 10 fingers.
We think, 'I'm Ricky Hatton or I'm Tyson Fury, I can take on the world.' You can take on the world in the ring but this problem called depression, you can't take it on.
We're out of our comfort zones with depression. I certainly was and whenever I have bad days now I speak to someone to get it off my chest.
