The most inspirational person in my life has been my mother.
Nicole Maines
It's OK not to understand the whole trans thing. That's alright. My dad didn't understand it. I still don't know everything. What's important is you sort of educate yourself on your own time, but you have to respect it on everyone else's time. Because no one should have to wait for equality.
We can be whoever we want. We can do whatever we want. We can be superheroes, because in many ways we are. We've had trans representation in television for a while, but it hasn't been the right representation.
Family has been really important to me.
Acceptance at home is fundamental, yes, but frankly, it's just not enough. Trans youth, like most young people, spend the majority of their time at school. If you spent Monday to Friday from 8 to 3 being told that you weren't okay, that you were wrong, how are you meant to think otherwise?
My acting and activism go hand-in-hand, and they really support one another.
For a number of years at my public elementary school in rural Maine, I was treated like all the other girls in school. That changed in September 2007 when a male classmate, set on a path by his grandfather, followed me into the girls' restroom. The end result was that I had to use the school's staff bathroom - just me, no one else.
I studied digital arts and graphic design, and then, at the same time I was studying, I was still doing auditions.
Children are a lot smarter than we give them credit for.
Because you never know when a transgender person is going to come into your life, you need to be prepared, and you need to be ready to help them.
When I was first trying to explain to my parents that I was really a girl, my father didn't know what to do. He had these preconceived notions about what his family was going to be like, and when I didn't fit into those notions, he just ignored what I was trying to tell them before he really came around.
I am transgender. I knew that I was for as long as I can remember.
Now that we've seen broader representation of trans identities, I think it's safer to explore the fault in these trans characters and make them entirely human and three dimensional.
It's good to have a free space to laugh and cry and get angry about gender and sexuality. That's one of the things I am the most thankful for from my friends and my family. They've given me the place to freely have gender be a part of our discourse.
I hope I can help convince people there that being transgender is not a big deal and that we are just average people trying to go to school, work, and live good lives.
When we have trans actors play trans characters, people can look onscreen and say, 'OK, this is what trans is.'
I did a guest episode of 'Royal Pains,' and then right after that, 'Supergirl' happened, and I was like, 'How did I get here?' Every day, I walk on set, and I'm waiting for someone to be like, 'Ma'am, you can't be here.'
There are infinite combinations that people can experience, because no two people are alike, and no two people's identities should be expected to be alike. I mean, we see it in fashion: one size does not fit all. And I think it's, you know, completely ridiculous that we've expected people's identities to be one size fits all.
At some point, I want to create a family and help them on their journey like my family helped me on mine.
What I'm really excited for is to see the evolution of trans characters and see more diverse stories be told, so that every time we're on screen, we're not really playing the part of educator and having to explain the experience to the audience, because it will have already been normalized.
Saying it now sounds obvious, but that can be really hard to remember when you're a trans kid who feels like your world's been turned upside down. Just having someone to see in the media is so empowering and validating.
Gender is something that occurs in the mind, and sex is something that occurs, you know, everywhere else on the body. And whether or not those two things happen to align - well, if they do, great. If they don't, also great.
We didn't have anyone to tell us that what was going on with me was alright. There was no information about transgender people when we started our journey, but we managed to make it through because of the tremendous amount of love that our family had.
Cisgender actors don't take trans roles out of malice. I think it's just failure to realize the context behind having cisgender people play transgender characters because we don't see the same issue with sexuality.
My father grew up very conservative, and he really had set expectations for what boys and girls were supposed to be like. So when I came out to him, that did not fit into his plan of what raising twin boys was going to be like.
We tried our best to work with the school and with the other families in the school system, and we did a gradual transition. I started transitioning when I was in first grade, and every year we kind of tacked a new thing on to it.
I always loved theater, growing up, and I was always like, 'Wow, it would be so fun to be an actor.' But my next thought was, like, 'I'm from Nowhere, Maine.' You know, no one's from Maine!
I know from first-hand experience that separating transgender students from their peers can cause many to leave school, hide who they are, or even do the unthinkable.
Historically, we have seen cis men play trans women and vice versa. That casting breaks through the fourth wall, and it gives people the message that trans people are being played by cis men in real life, which is where we get this idea of men in dresses.
I think kids need to watch 'Supergirl' for Nia, because there are more and more trans people coming out younger and younger.
I think accurately presenting a trans character means not presenting them as perfect - I think there's been a pressure to do this with trans characters. They can have no flaws because they must represent the entire trans community.
I had been on puberty suppressants and hormone suppressants, so I did not go through male puberty.
If I had a super power, I'd want to be able to fly just so I could float around my apartment. Or I'd really like telekinesis because then you'd be able to slam the door on somebody.
Having trans people play trans roles show that we are valid in our identities, and we exist.
With trans folks, we have a lot of people accusing us of just playing dress up for whatever reasons, and that's just not true.
I knew that I was trans when I was three years old. Well, I didn't know 'trans' because I didn't know there was a word for it, but I just knew that in my head and my heart that I was supposed to be a girl.
Separate but equal does not work.
I would say my brother got lucky with me. Because we grew up with only boy neighbors, I developed a liking to shoot-'em-up and military video games. I could have come out a lot girlier.
The thought of being a boy makes me cringe. I just couldn't do it.
I think everything's going to turn out pretty well for me.
The first thing that's really important to understand, just when approaching the topic of transgender people, is that the sex you're assigned with at birth is not the same as your gender identity.
It seems only fitting that we have a trans superhero for trans kids to look up to. I wish there was a trans superhero when I was little.
This entire issue of transgender people posing a kind of threat to cisgender women in bathrooms is made up. We are just like everybody else - we go into the bathroom, we keep our heads down, we don't look at anybody.
Kids and just young people in general are usually a lot more, I guess, open-minded to change. Especially when you're really little in elementary school, you don't expect a lot of things from people, so if somebody says, 'I'm switching genders,' you're just sort of like, 'OK, that's new. But cool.'
I think it is necessary to educate folks on trans issues and to make them aware of trans identities and normalise it, because it is normal. But when you're shielded from something, and it's actively censored, it takes a negative connotation.
When we have a trans woman playing a trans woman, then you see, 'Oh wait, this is what trans really is. This is what it looks like: a person.' That sends a message to trans kids that they are valid in their identities that they are allowed to exist.
My family knew that they loved me, and whatever this 'I want to be a girl' business was, it certainly wasn't about to change that.
I think, for all trans people, it's not our only defining feature, but it is a defining feature.
Growing up, I was from kind of Nowhere, Maine. And, so, now having thousands of people reaching out to me via social media and thousands of people paying attention to what I say, that's really weird.
Everybody loves superheroes, and so to be associated with a superhero forever is just kind of like, that's where the goalposts are. That's kind of, 'Bam, you're immortalized!'
